I NEED A DOCTOR



I NEED A DOCTOR

dinosaur fish
carved in pine and painted in acrylic by Robert Margetts

I’ve got ants in my pants

 and a needle in my eye—

well, not a real one, silly,

but it sure feels like it sometimes!

 

I’ve got a frog in my throat

and bats in my belfry too.

I’ve got a charley horse in my leg

 and puppy love—what can I do?

 

Sometimes I’m so hungry

I could gobble up a horse,

but I’m way too chicken,

so I eat pancakes, of course.

 

Sometimes my dogs are barking

and hurting like the dickens,

’cause when I had the chicken pox

I scratched like crazy chickens.

 

Mommy says I remember things

just like an elephant can,

but Daddy says my brain is small—

the size of an ant, that man!

 

Grandma says I’m fast like a cheetah

on the run,

but Grandpa says I’m slow as a sloth

 who’s having fun.

 

I monkey around,

I horse around,

I buzz like a grumpy bee,

and sometimes I’m a loon

who laughs so hard I sneeze!

 

Yep… with all these silly problems,

and all this animal‑y doom,

I think I’d better see the doctor—

Like real soon!

I need a doctor